It took me a while to figure out what I wanted to post first and it might take me a while to figure out what the next one will be..!!
Inspiration hit me while I was swimming just now - I wondered why I still swam and trained..? I stopped racing triathlons nearly 2 years ago, a disc bulged a year ago, and I have said on a number of occasions how crazy long distance races are for the body - yet here I am heading back down the endurance path. I explored the more natural movements of Movnat, playground/parkour ish type things and attended the WildFitness coaches course in Spain and whilst I enjoyed them and got a good workout, it didn’t satisfy me…..
What dawned on me swimming - in my 15mtr condo pool,(so it is really not swim training as I used to do it) was how present I become when I train this way ( i.e. longer ) whether it is swim, bike or run. I have time to focus on how I am moving, how my body feels, how the water feels on my skin, or the ground beneath my feet or the sun on my face or the sound of the wheels as they turn and tuning in as to whether I need to change gear or not.
Basically I am meditating.
My mind rarely wanders and when it does I bring it back to the present.
I used to say this and have had the reply - “but you’re moving, that’s not meditating’ - isn't it?
Today I realised it is and it is a big part of who I am and how I stay calm and true to myself in this world where to quote Ralph Waldo Emerson :
“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”
Do we all go through phases of trying to figure out who we are? Maybe not - maybe some of you are there, some don’t want to go there and then there are those of us in the middle sussing ourselves out in life and accepting ourselves and not trying to ‘fit in’ but find out where we belong.
I went to a chakra healing and meditation the other night, the conventional type of one - it was the best thing I could have done for myself on a friday night and possibly is what has helped me to come to a few conclusions today.
I am lots of things and they can all reside in me and all of them are me and that’s ok!.
I am still an athlete, even if I’m not racing at the moment - I love to train and be fit and strong the triathlete way.
I am a Pilates trainer by profession and love teaching it and I honour my body by practising Pilates.
I am an artist who can get lost in the paints on the canvas.
I am a chef who reads then disregards the recipe.
I am a daughter who loves and is grateful for her parents, very much.
I am a friend and when you truly get to know me, I am always there and will never take you for granted or judge you as you do the same for me.
I am a lover - when I have the opportunity…….. and a lover of life.
Basically I am ME and if I rub you up the wrong way by how I am - please take a moment of reflection and ask “why” is it something about yourself you might not like that you see in me?.
That’s how I have come to realise who I am, learning from all I meet and reflecting back on myself.
There are some things I am still learning to accept about being me and I like that!
At the end of the day and of this post, I am pretty damn happy with who I am and what I do and how I chose to live my life.