I stopped blogging again didn’t I… The reason, well for a while I was in a negative space and although it might have been the honesty of what I was feeling, I didn’t want to send negativity into the world! I do think it is important to share our reality, including the bad times and not just the smiles that something like facebook often shows - but it wasn’t the right time for me…
Soo thank you for your patience in waiting for me to return and play my music on my lap top keyboard.
I sit and write from the Grouper Bar (will no doubt not finish this blog here though) - it is one of the bars at Bawah Reserve, the island I now call home. This blog is to share the story of how I came to be here, so are you sitting comfortably!!… I won’t go on toooooo much I promise - my toes are crossed!).
It started with a feeling of unrest last year - where was I going in life, where did I want to live, what did I want to do!?? Small questions. Coaching got me closer to some answers and I reread my scribbles from 6 months ago - I wanted to live somewhere away from the big city, on an island, near water, no materialism/consumerism, within a community of sorts, teaching movement but less than I was and be able to draw, coach and use more of my skills. I wanted out of Singapore basically.
Forward a few months. I’d applied for my own EP under my own company and was waiting patiently to find out. Getting it would have given me the freedom I craved in Singapore - the ability to do more than just teach for one studio and spread my wings,
In May it was approved - a very very happy day.
It was agreed I’d leave my current employ and I went into planning mode, where to go, what else I could do and so on.
Then I stopped for a while and sat still - yes me, I sat still.
Over a public holiday weekend, I had 3 days at home and accompanied by a few glasses (bottles??) of red wine what I wanted became clear to me.
It wasn’t Singapore - my EP had set me free in more ways than one and when I realised that was what I wanted, relief flooded me. Now what to do!!!
In the mean time I had been introduced to the COO of Bawah Reserve. I’d spoken to him as the office is in Singapore - well it was an interview that I didn’t realise I was having ( I know…) and then I received an invite to visit the island!! woohoooooo.
That was the first week of July, and an overnight stay turned into a week and at the end of that week, having fallen in love with the island - I was offered a job. A job that included all the things I said above, plus teaching the staff English - another skill I have that I was contemplating using again.
I was floating - all I wanted seemed to be happening. I had a plan B of going to Thailand and just spending some time to really think of my next steps. Plan B wasn’t needed right now.
The interim time was spent packing, moving, tidying things up, saying some good byes, last client sessions, then I headed back to Bawah at the beginning of August for another week and before I could start officially I headed to Europe to teach.
My second week in Bawah was an odd emotional one - I knew I was going to work there, but I wasn’t yet - very much a limbo feeling. The island still wrapped her arms around me and felt like home but knowing how to be was a bit lost to me - limbo…!
I returned to Singapore having found a replacement to teach the classes, then I boarded a plane Spain to see my parents. It was a journey to get there with my domestic Spanish flight cancelled and an overnight stay above the train station! Always an adventure to be had….
5 days with my parents was wonderful before heading to Zurich to teach in a studio of people I’d met 4 years ago. Zurich was awesome, the trainers so keen, and I liked the vibe of Switzerland, the scenery and the freshness was a refreshing change. The hospitality I received was second to none. I met with so many people I knew; it was just what I needed to regain some confidence I’d lost over the last 2 of my years in Singapore.
It was hard though knowing someone else was on ‘my’ island teaching for me - not a feeling I enjoyed and at times paranoia took over…. But the universe had answered me with the job and I would be returning.
And I did on Thursday 30th August I got on the seaplane to take me home, as the plane did her circle of the islands, tears welled up - I was home.
The first week was full of insights into this industry, an industry that is totally new to me. Being part of a big team, living in a small community, learning how to speak to guests and sussing out all the aspects of my role.
I’ve had an occasional moment of “jeez can I do this” to “yes yes yes” to “did I say the right thing” to “damn I’m doing ok….” - yes just in a week!
My second week, I feel I have found my grove better - taught some English, put some scripts together, have some more Bahasa words in my vocabulary and started to understand more the life in hospitality.
I have taken over 500 photos, as each time the sun rises and sets the sky and the island shines differently. The treks into the forest continue to calm me, swimming and seeing the fish is on-going excitement and the people make me smile many many times a day.
This island is magical and I can’t tell you why, it just is. There is something about it, something special, and each day I fall in love more with everything here.
I know I’ll have some more downs and that’s ok, and I’ll likely want to be off the island at times too, and that’s ok!
All part of the process of this new path of my life…